Woman slammed as ‘cruel’ because she doesn’t want stepdaughter to call her mum

Family is never completely straightforward, and things can be tricky when there are stepchildren in the equation.

Lot of stepparents worry about whether their partner’s kids will accept them, as forming close bonds with someone new can be a challenge

One woman is having a more unusual issue, as she she doesn’t want her stepdaughter to call her mum – and doesn’t know how to tell her husband.

Writing on Mumsnet, she said: "My hubby and I have been together 10 years, he has a 11 yo [daughter] and has full custody of her (last time she saw her mum she was about 1).

"I also have 3 sons with him. She is the only one who doesn’t call me ‘mum’ in the house.

"She asked me a couple of weeks ago if she could call me mum like her 3 brothers.

"My [husband] is very very very excited about it, for him it’s a sign that she loves me.

"But I am not comfortable with the idea, I have my own kids. I am scared to tell my husband because he seems to be so happy of her asking me.

"How can I tell him ? Am I being cruel ?"

She then commented to clarify that the 11-year-old has started calling her mum, but it makes her "so uncomfortable" and she wants her husband to tell the girl to stop.

The mum’s post received dozens of comments from people criticising her for being "cruel", especially as she as known the girl most of her life.

One said: "This is brutal and if I was you I’d question myself on why I want to not be seen as this kids mum, especially when you’ve effectively raised her.

"I think you will cause a lot of upset, maybe irreparably if you put a stop to it, so if I was you I’d swallow my feelings and accept this."

Another wrote: "Why are you so against this? You HAVE been her her mum, all her life! I’d feel absolutely honoured. I’m trying to not to be rude here but you’re coming across really badly!"

Others said they were "heartbroken" on the little girl’s behalf, and some questioned why the woman sees her so differently to her own kids – with several suggesting counselling on the issue.

Do you think it would be cruel to ask her to stop? Let us know in the comments.

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