My girlfriend started punching me while we had sex and tried to scratch my face

DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend started punching me while we had sex and tried to scratch my face. It all went so wrong.

We work at the same shopping centre. She’s 18 and I’m a 28-year-old man.

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She takes drugs and drinks heavily. I’ve noticed that sometimes the combination makes her abusive.

The relationship is toxic, and I’ve had to call the police on her twice. They advised me to block her, but sometimes she will ring on a friend’s phone so I answer – then I can’t resist.

When she’s nice, she’s just lovely but there’s a side to her which I really don’t like.

DEIDRE SAYS: There are alarm bells ringing for me. 

At the end of the day, violence is never acceptable in any relationship.

If she can give up the drink and drugs, then you may see a calmer side – but don’t give her more than one further chance. Either she finds help with her addictions or you are over.

You can both find support at, which offers free, confidential help online and at local centres. They can help you end this damaging relationship once and for all.

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