When was the last time your boss praised you for a job well done?
In a recent survey from management consultancy Gallup, just 30% of workers said they’d “received recognition or praise for doing good work” over the past week – and it’s having a big impact on employee wellbeing.
Almost two-thirds (60%) of people said they feel ’emotionally detached’ at work, while 19% are downright ‘miserable’.
When asked ‘did you feel stress yesterday?’ a concerning 59% of people said ‘yes,’ with grievances such as heavy workloads and a lack of praise contributing factors.
But why are so many workplaces facing a praise drought?
Nancy Roberts, who offers career coaching, training and mentoring, believes some managers are stuck in a negativity loop.
‘Probably the most common reason that I come across is simply – and rather sadly – that the boss never received praise themselves, meaning they haven’t seen that behaviour role-modelled in their own work life and don’t therefore see the importance of it,’ she tells Metro.co.uk.
‘Perhaps they have built their career in work environments where their relationship with their manager was more transactional and learnt their management style from them, and it simply doesn’t occur to them to give praise.’
On the flipside, she’s also seen plenty of managers who ‘just feel a bit shy about or embarrassed by giving praise’. This could be a sign they need some management training or support to get there.
The impact of a praise drought will really depend on the individual. If someone’s less experienced, new to a role or lacking confidence, Nancy says this lack of validation could increase anxiety and even prevent them performing at their best.
Separate research from Glassdoor also found that six in 10 employees feel ‘lonely’ at work, so operating in a silo without praise or connection from the wider team is unlikely to help.
But for others, external validation is really not a big deal.
‘Others – and I include myself in this category – are more internally motivated and tend to judge their performance by whether they believe they have done a good job,’ Nancy explains.
‘In this case praise might be less important, but it’s obviously still always nice to be told you have done a good job, and to have that recognised. Basically, there isn’t really a downside to giving praise!’
So, how can you ask for more praise?
It can feel seriously awkward to ask for compliments, so Nancy recommends asking your boss for ‘feedback’ instead of ‘praise’ or ‘recognition’.
‘You could also solicit some feedback from others that you work with (so colleagues you interact with regularly in other teams, for example) and have a conversation with your boss which is structured around “I had this positive feedback from X, which felt really good. I wondered how you felt about my work on that project,” which will open up a possibility for them to reinforce that praise.’
Sometimes, it’s worth recognising that managers are often very busy too – a lack of praise doesn’t necessarily mean they think you’re doing a bad job.
‘They might be trying to do their best but have just missed that they haven’t praised you because there’s so much going on with them,’ says Nancy.
‘Simply saying that it would help you if they let you know when you’ve done something right might solve the problem – managers are human too!’
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