Sideswipe: The real meaning of ‘fair enough’ . . .

Noise pollution

An enthusiastic backyard-sweeper writes: “Cycling around a city buzzing with the sounds of summer gardening, I find myself wondering whether the leaf blower (electric or petrol-fuelled) is the most anti-social invention in the history of the world. It replaces a perfect piece of technology (the broom) as old as the caveman; it consumes fossil fuels in its manufacture and operation; its penetrating whine breaks the holiday silence and, to judge by the way I see it used on my rides, it exists for the purpose of making the user’s problem (the leaves) someone else’s – it seems to be used mainly to blow leaves off the user’s land onto his neighbour’s or into the gutter.”

A punishment to make you gag

Chicken poop has a strong and suffocating smell of ammonia that’s hard to stand for more than a few minutes. The odour causes vomiting, headache and irritation – even stress and depression. The toxicity of chicken poop was taken advantage of by Abbotsford—a city in British Columbia, Canada. In 2013, in a depraved attempt to drive out homeless people from the streets of Abbotsford, city workers dumped a truck of chicken poop and spread it over a patch of land where homeless people used to camp. And in 1893, during the French occupation of Thailand, French troops built a small prison cell in Laem Sing. The holding cell was on the ground floor. Above this was a chicken coop. The floor of the coop was perforated, which caused bird poop to rain down on the poor prisoners below. The prison was known as Khuk Khi Kai, or “chicken poop prison”. (Amusing Planet)

Bad landlord

Awkward love

“After our first date, he dropped me off at my apartment and gave me an awkward kiss in which he missed half of my face because the flowers and leftovers I was holding were in the way. Well, after I walked up my three flights of stairs, I got a call. It was him, asking if I could come back down for a ‘redo kiss’ because that kiss didn’t accurately represent how good he thought the date had gone. He then met me at the door and gave my a proper kiss, and I floated back up those stairs. I knew then that he was the one because he was as awkward as I am.”

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